whee

2009-07-30T23:49:00.000-07:00

when I always think that there are many friends out there that I can turn to seek to when I'm feeling very down, only one or two are willing to solve the problem with me step by step. He is the unexpected one. When I thought that maybe that someone will be the one who will go through with me, where is he when I expressed I needed someone to talk to? When Im undergoing a whole lot of stress under the project, I need to do my part by myself because it's my part. that's when everything came crashing down feeling how stupid I am and how internet is so fucking useless. it relate to many other stupid questions on why didn't I go Australia instead when I had the chance to. This REL project made me really thought through out of the box, thought through who are the ones who are sincerely helping me. I'm not in the fucking mood to talk to anyone who just want to talk for the sake of talking, it's really nasty when I start not talking to you, don't believe? ask someone who I had did that to before. Seriously, no matter how much stupidity I have in me at least, I'm a loyal friend.

):

2009-07-30T11:19:00.001-07:00

FUCK I WANT TO KEEL MYSELF

FUCKING NEH NEH

2009-07-30T08:56:00.000-07:00

law is driving me crazy ): i dont know how to do. I need someone to talk to me. I need that someone but that someone is not replying me. Im like almost bursting inside, Im like on the verge of crying. this project is not that difficult but i'm really really not in the right mind to think about anything. i know i'm always saying this but does the people out there know how im feeling everytime i say this. it's really like i want to scratch out all of my hair, tear my books, eat all the chips, everything man. I just need the correct someone to vent my anger on or at least talk to me. ARGH FUCK FUCK FUCK. ): im damn damn damn damn arghhhh inside.

2009-07-29T09:54:00.000-07:00

tumblr's not working so coming back here for a while but i'll be back in tumblr because I prefer how it's simple there. but i need a space to rant.
I just realise I've been relying on Ifwat too much ): cannot sleep, call him, bored, msg him, unhappy cry to him. Sigh. He's my good friend but I shouldnt trouble him that much aye? I cannot be his vampire ): and besides he has other girls to entertain to. HAHA
work & school they are things that have been keeping me away from my social life. my social life is like very low now (SIMS) ): but I really need this life, to keep me away from thinking about Shan. I still constantly look at their blogs and each day I found something new. It's painstaking but this is the most that I can do to keep my mind at ease ( I dont know from what since I'm no longer with Shan) this life is difficult but i seriously need to live this alone.
I miss:
the times when we were lying on the bed listening to Jason Mraz song
when the three of us ate take outs and watching AXN/HBO
looking at you ironing your clothes/kilating your boots
watching both of you guys doing the house work
visiting cathay with you
your suprise visits
the calls we always have every night before lights out
having shih lin/ice milo for you, blue coral for dy, and soy milk for me
and really alot of things
although that was not the life that i will like to have at all but I'd been adopting the mindset of reminiscing rather than reprimanding ): shit this is torturous.
heard from your brother that you'd been busy with work/sister's and family visit/parents arriving. and also trying to hit on other girls (this is the part that is unpleasant but since the first day i really know you, i'm not suprised) hope you'll take care of your health properly since you always fall sick easily. hais ):
Ifwat's cool but I don't want to treat him as a substitution that's why I really won't like him.
Ifwat will be the last guy that I'll really open up to until I can accept the fact that Shan will no longer be back in my life. because I don't want to have many guys to appear in my life to keep changing my mindset about guys.
shit can I be a lesbian? minus the getting turn on by my own things part. Let's foresee my future of being lesbian. say my partner is A
Scene: On the couch watching chick flick at night (sleepover)
F: I love you honey
A: I love you too *attempts to hug & minor details*
*Parents see*
F: I told you if we go beyond that I will want to break up with you. Bye.
Shit I'll be hurting a girl's heart if I do that. Cannot think about it Fiona! ARGH!

2009-05-22T21:52:00.000-07:00

shifted: http://leeyinxin.xanga.com/

2009-05-18T00:49:00.000-07:00

ssup :D
im damn bored now before lesson and i was stupid enough to like laugh at the screen when no one was beside me cos i was bloghopping
anyway. these few days i kept seeing someone that im amused at with big boobies(:
i think only my homies know what im talking about
damn i shall stop being so into her if not later people think im a lesbo having some obsession over a girl D:
ok enough of that big boobie girl.
it's been a long time since i blog huh
so fast my baby boy is going through his pass out parade to be a man of the country this friday (quoted by him ok!)
eeeeekkkkkkkkkk (: bhb kid
okok i think chu sheng needs his laptop back i shall update more when i get back home

2009-05-04T08:28:00.000-07:00

back to private blog for a while.

2009-04-14T08:29:00.000-07:00

ssup ssup (:
i shall post a tad before i continue serious business
today i went all the way to tampiness to meet my homies!
it's like..........................................................................................................................
I TOOK 4 BUSES AND WAITED SO LONGGGGGG AT THE BUS STOPS SWEATY FOR THE BUSES
AND I WAS LATE SOMEMORE
my bad hehe (:
but i took 1hr45mins home!!!!!!!
passing by singapore's red light district
was quite amused because i was wearing my shades
when the sky got dark
but i could see bright lights
HAHAHAHAAHA :D
anyway it's quite sudden
S texted me first asking me to meet on friday.
but tooooo bad i have camp (:
hehe and im going out with my homies happy ttm can?
and called to say hi & * **** ***
hopefully is not pms-ing then so sudden.
heehee ok i gotta prepare for camp tmr
you wont see this facebook maniac online for 2 nights probably 3 (:
heehee (:
xxxxxxxxx

2009-04-11T11:23:00.000-07:00

SSUPPPP! I is here to do a public blog
because I r support my lover, YIHUI!
anyway, dont worry i wont bore you guys with my granny story!
HAHA!
Today I went to Kittycare haven off Kranji way.
Sh's sister cats are kept there so I went to visit with my lover and our new gay maria
pictures shall replace my granny story.
but first, you must add me on facebook and then see the pictures LOL
or you can contact 1800-felines-for-life
dialled already?
did it ring?
a sexy sound on the other line isnt it?
then i suggest you put down the phone
cos i was just breaking your leg!
hope it's not broken!

eeeheeeheee cheeky seh!
i very long never meet Sh, but he dont want to meet me
cos im very smelly and irritating that's why!
but then like that why maria & lover want to meet me?

people tell me NS men are busy people
busy then no social life ah?
then can break promise meh?
but I also dont want to see them already
turn off sia (a particular one la. the rest dont come and kachek me ok!)
speaking of NS share with you guys something that jon shared with me
here!

sorry la now those smart ones (not bimbos)
know something is going on ah..
that speak for my new blog url.

you know why?
dont know ah?
too bad lo. at least i know!
that means im not bimbo ok!!!!

ok la i shall stop being random,
laoniang need to hit the sack
236am already leh. later papa in heaven not happy
cos tomorrow need to see him in the holy place

then see if didi they all still on for the sentosa lepak not
heeheehee

paiseh, my blog cursor just dont like the template and her highness very lazy to root the problem when she has soo many to deal with

2009-03-30T08:26:00.001-07:00

hee (: